Can West Virginia defeat #3 Virginia Tech?

YES

In Saturday's match up the VA Tech Hokies are favored by a less than impressive 10 points. I firmly believe that The Mountaineers can beat the spread, but even more so, I believe that WVU can actually win the game. Allow me to share a few reasons:

1. Mountaineer Field: This is a home game for West Virginia. Anyone that's familiar with Mountaineer Field knows that it's a downright miserable place to play. It's cold in the summer, freezing in the winter, and you could at any point find yourself being pelted with batteries, pennies, or various other dangerous objects. In the past the incidents have gotten so bad that many Big East coaches advise their players to keep their helmets on at all times.

2. Red Zone Scoring: WVU has been successful in 10 of it's 15 trips to the red zone this year, 9 of which have resulted in touchdowns.

3. Mountaineer Field 2: West Virginia leads the Morgantown series 16-8.

4. Tradition: WVU leads the all time series 28-21-1 (including 2 of the last 3)

5. Experience: Six of West Virginia's defensive players have played 2 or more games against the Hokies

6. Rushing: No, we're not talking about the backfield, West Virginia QB Pat White is currently leading the team with 194 yards on 29 carries. The Hokies defense is one of the best in the nation and will certainly attempt to shut down the pass, so, when in doubt just run with it.

7. Defense: Although VA Tech does have one of the top defensive systems in the nation, The Mountaineers' program is certainly no joke. WVU has been winning games on the defensive side of the ball this season as well as offensively.

8. Containment: Everyone knows that the key to stopping the Hokies is stopping Marcus Vick. The Mountaineers have the equipment to do so, and coach Rodriguez has made it clear that it's the plan. Keep in mind, Virginia Tech has gone NINE straight quarters without scoring an offensive touchdown against West Virginia’s defense. Tech’s last offensive TD came in the third quarter of the 2002 game in Blacksburg, a 21-18 WVU victory.

9. 2003: In 2003 a #3 ranked VA Tech team confidently marched into Milan Puskar Stadium in Morgantown, West Virginia. They marched back out with a 28-7 loss.

10. Playstation 2: Keep in mind, I positively OWNED Virginia Tech this season on my Playstation. In fact, if the PS2 is any indication, the upcoming Louisville game will be a cakewalk too (but watch out for Southern Florida).

So mortgage your homes, sell your cars and borrow from friends then put it all on the line, WVU will cover the spread, they'll cover it all the way to the win column.

For entertainment purposes only, disclaimer disclaimer disclaimer.

Final:

WVU 17 - VA Tech 10

Sergeant Howie: Your lordship seems strangely... unconcerned.
Lord Summerisle: I am confident your suspicions are wrong, Sergeant. We do not commit murder here. We are a deeply religious people.
Sergeant Howie: Religious? With ruined churches, no ministers, no priests... and children dancing naked!
Lord Summerisle: They do love their divinity lessons.
Sergeant Howie: But they are... a-are naked!
Lord Summerisle: Well, naturally. It's much too dangerous to jump through fire with their clothes on.


Just another reminder of the Rocktoberfest blowout at Vickie's this Saturday. It's on Happy Top and it's on the right. Other than that I can best explain by saying, "look for the cars and/or the giant fire."

If you need directions you can email Vickie at vickie.charles@thetravelauthority.com, she'll be happy to guide you right to her front door. The party starts at eight, so be prompt! You don't want to know what we do to late arrivals!

Sorry for the late post, I've been in the big city... WHOO!

Anyway, back in July I broke the news to all of my conservative friends that Ann Coulter was a man. Since some of you may not have taken me seriously, allow me to provide yet another piece of photographic evidence. Sorry guys, but the pictures don't lie.

As if that isn't gross enough, I'd also like to share another little gem. We've established that Ann Coulter is a man, that's no longer up for discussion. However, I'd like to go just a little bit further and prove that he is also either a biological experiment or perhaps a space alien. What you are about to see is taken from another website (thus the DUDE, WTF on the picture... in fact, that may be the first time I've ever typed the letters w-t-f in that order), but the point is still clear.

ANN COULTER HAS AT LEAST ONE REALLY CREEPY HAND!!

So there you go. Feel free to agree with his politics and feel free to quote his articles, but please don't ever tell me that Ann Coulter is hot again. Oh, and please don't tell him that I said that, I don't want to be bitch slapped with that giant thing.

I have it on good authority that Daylan has a new girlfriend.

Not much to say today, but I do have a couple of links to share.

This one goes to one of the coolest sites on the entire web. Some cat took the time to recreate scenes from the Bible using exclusively lego blocks. I can't imagine the amount of time that must go into doing something like this.



The second link will direct you to a video archive with an extensive collection of terribly funny stuff. It's all here, Celebrity Jeopardy, The Niggar Family and that Family Guy clip with the A-Ha video.

"Please understand. We don't want no trouble. We just want the right to be different. That's all."

With that line, I fell in love with a band.

It was like hearing something for the first time, each time I'd hear it. The lyrics were laced with such a dark, dry wit. The music seemed to actually make pop music (something that, at the time, I abhorred) seem so cool and so damn interesting. The songs seemed to be about people that I knew, but written in a way and spoken in an accent that seemed so unlike them. It was chaotic, but orderly... it was

I hate to gush, but this band really did turn me on to an entire world of music that I'd never even realized was there. British Music, I always assumed, was just like American Music (I guess that's the arrogance of the USA). It had never occurred to me that there were bands, HUGE across the pond, that we never heard a peep of in the states. These guys would pop up on 120 Minutes or appear on WRFL, but other than that they were a mystery. Of course I knew about bands like Oasis and The Verve, but never realized the amount of success they were having overseas... and I assumed that the masses worldwide ignored The Smiths.

Luckily, David Rogers took notice. It was David that introduced me to the BritPop scene, and thus the band that would capture my imagination and cause me to threaten many a trip to the Glastonbury or Leeds/Reading Festival in England. Pulp was in my head, and endlessly in my stereo.



Of course, it wasn't just me. Everyone seemed to find something to love in this band. When people heard the sounds coming from the speakers they seemed to be completely enraptured by the songs. From music snobs to top forty chicks, it seemed that everyone around me was falling in love with Pulp. You could attend a party at the "Rock & Roll House" in Stanton and hear a chorus of "Common People" belted out by the same drunks that just stumbled through an Alabama or David Allen Coe song. I have listened to Pulp during demolition derbies, vodka drinking contests, and even in the loving arms of a lady or two.

Of course, no mention of Pulp is complete without a mention of the band's enigmatic lead singer, Jarvis Cocker


Jarvis seemed to have a way of turning a phrase in just such a way to make it riotously funny or particularly heartbreaking. He had the stage presence of a 70's rock god with the shy geekiness of that guy that sat behind you in your college calculus class. It was as if he performed for an audience in a vacuum. It was nearly impossible to avert your eyes, and if you did manage to accomplish that feat it was short lived... soon your eyes were right back on him.

For my 21st birthday my cousin gave me a plane ticket. Actually, it was just a card with permission to use her frequent flyer miles to fly anywhere in the country that I chose. It seemed obvious... hold the ticket, wait for Pulp to come to the states and fly to whatever far away destination they played (god knows they weren't coming to Lexington). So, for months I sat, waiting to find out where they'd be and what exotic town I'd get to visit. I imagined bumping into Jarvis after the show and explaining to him that I'd flown from Kentucky to see them, and then I imagined he'd make some snappy comment and I'd have absolutely no response. Unfortunately, Pulp broke up before they could make it back to the USA. Shortly thereafter so did my cousin and her husband. He won the frequent flyer miles in the divorce; I lost my chance to head out west for the first time.

It's this particular band that takes me back to a time in my life that I can genuinely say I truly enjoyed. It reminds me of a time when everyone lived within a ten minute drive of each other, and we all just took it for granted. It makes me think back to friends that I've had and friends I've lost. Since those days some of them have passed away, some moved across the country, some I've just fallen out with (often my own damn fault). But I can always put in "Different Class" or "This is Hardcore" and remember a time when we were all together. I can sit back, listen to "Disco 2000" and remember belting it out in Chad's old, black pickup truck. I can remember singing "Like A Friend" with Aaron on the streets of Nashville after a particularly interesting cab ride. I can think back to a time when Daxon and I serenaded an audience of intoxicated teenage girls with a particularly rousing version of "Common People."

I guess it's not the band that made life so great back then, but the people. Either way, it's nice to have something meaningful that a man can look back on.

Thanks Jarvis.

First of all, congratulations to the Cincinnati Bengals for yet another impressive victory! Granted, a win over the Bears these days really isn't all that spectacular, but to do it with 5 interceptions and to look that good on the field is always impressive. As predicted, Cincy appears to be the real deal this year and keep in mind, the last time that the Bengals opened the season 3-0 they were Superbowl bound!

The Patriots beat the Steelers with a last second field goal. Why does the NFL make such a big deal out of the last second field goal? Seriously, there is no more boring end to an exciting football game than the field goal. Where's the drama? The ball is snapped, caught, and kicked from a maximum of fifty-five or so yards by a guy that you've paid no attention to all season. The only moment when the last second field goal even remotely becomes exciting is when the kicker misses the damn thing, and that's such a rarity that it only seems to happen when I'm at home playing Madden '06 with my 7-inch lineman!

But, I guess the real comment here is that the Steelers and Patriots went face to face last night and no major injuries came from the contest... damn, I need to find a new Voodoo Priest.

I don't say this about many people, but I really want to be Matt Leinart. Normally I'm the first guy to jump on the bandwagon and hate someone like this, but I just have to hand it to the guy. He's the best college football player in history, could very well carry that type of accolade in the pro game, and despite the fact that he's one of the biggest stars in the United States seems remarkably humble.

On an unrelated note, I really, really hate the new Nissan commercials that feature that old Civ song "Can't Wait One Minute More." I hate them more than the Steelers. I hate them more than the Patriots. I hate them more than Chad Johnson's platinum teeth... ok, I don't hate them more than that.

I don't know if you guys remember this song, but it was released around 1995 on the album "Set Your Goals" for Lava Records (I can't possibly explain why I remember that). It was a very minor hit, I don't even know if I'd call it a hit... it was on MTV. I liked the song, bought the record, and then as most sensible people do, I forgot all about the song.

I'll admit that I smiled when I heard the song on the commercial, but after hearing the damn thing over and over and over I now realize that Nissan has made me not only dread hearing a song that I once loved, but they have now permanently associated a great song with a red racing stripe and cheap Japanese cars. Thanks Nissan. I can't help but wonder how they even came across the song. Who in the ad department said, "hey, remember that song?" I can assure you that he was greeted with blank stares.

I only hope that Nissan hasn't started a trend here. Can you imagine an advertising blitz of company after company resurrecting songs from the 90's that nearly everyone has forgotten about? What comes next? Uncle Tupelo for Zoloft? Crash Test Dummies for Campbell's Soup? Primitive Radio Gods for Nokia? Positive K for Eharmony.com?

The end is near, folks.

For those of you (like myself) that are upset with the EA Sports buyout of professional football don't worry, you're not alone. This could be the best Ebay ad in history.

BIG MOVIE WEEKEND!

Two big releases hit Lexington tonight thanks to Fred at the Kentucky Theater. The Kentucky will be featuring Jim Jarmusch's "Broken Flowers" and the new Werner Herzog documentary "Grizzly Man" on opposite screens through next week. And, for the night owls, this week's midnight movie is Napoleon Dynamite... eat your tots.

Well, Chris Coffey appears in front of a judge for the first time today. In preparation we have roughly tripled our law enforcement presence, installed metal detectors, and locked down the back entrances to the courthouse. I would suggest that this was, perhaps, overkill... but given the fact that everyone involved is threatening everyone else I think I'll just hide under my desk.

On the bright side, at least I'll get to see this Coffey guy that apparently I have to know from somewhere. I have to applaud the people of Powell County for not tearing the guy limb from limb when the actual crime occurred. I am surprised that cooler heads prevailed and he was simply arrested and will now go through the court system as the law intends. Although, I will admit, maybe just a small part of me thinks he deserves a little vigilante justice.

Well, the end of the world is upon us.

I can prove it, just look at the Apocolypse Relativity Chart.

The news is disturbing, no doubt. So, I've decided to curb some of your fears by giving you a dancing Shatner

There, doesn't that feel better?

Vote Tex!

The nominations for entry into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame were released yesterday and by hell it's a great class. Names on the ballot include John Mellancamp, Blondie, Grandmaster Flash, The Stooges, The Sex Pistols, Miles Davis, etc. However, of all the names on the ballot, one sticks out.

JOE TEX!

That's right, it's finally time to give Joe Tex the respect that he deserves.

Let's all hope and pray that Joe makes it in this year, if not for Joe then for yourself. I make this pledge right now... if Joe Tex makes it into the R&R HOF this year I will throw the damndest Joe Tex party that you've ever seen. So let's roll up our sleeves and get to work, do it for Joe, do it for America.

I don't know about you guys, but I'm glad to know that the Democrats and Republicans in the U.S. Senate are looking out for me. They work tirelessly to ensure my safety, keep up my way of life, and promote the American Dream, all that they ask is that I trust them.

Which is why I'm happy to say that with New Orleans under water, another Category 4 storm headed strong for the Gulf Coast, Osama Bin Laden and the Anthrax terrorist still on the loose and the Tony Danza show still on the air our elected officials have decided to tackle the real issues.

The search is over. The most attractive woman in the world has been found.

Her name is Melissa Theuiau and she happens to be a News Anchor somewhere in France. I'd have more information, but to be honest, I've spent most of my time just staring at pictures of her.

Congratulations Melissa Theuiau, you're the hottest woman alive!

Hail, Hail, Rock N' Roll.

I'd just like to point out that I've heard more great music this year than I have in ages.

I've spent the last five or so years complaining that everything was terrible, and that Radiohead had become some sort of Gods only because everything around them was so dreadful. Granted, I think Radiohead's recent stuff is crap. And to beat you to the punch, this isn't some sort of "I'll say I hate them to be different" kind of thing, I really don't like the music. I also really do believe that they've become legends simply because there's absolutely nothing interesting going on in music to rival them... because love 'em or hate 'em, Radiohead can make an "interesting" album.

That is, until this year.

2005 has managed to produce some of the most riveting and interesting music that I've heard in years. It seemed to start in late 2004 when (yes, I know some of these are older, I'm behind) I first was turned on to bands like Animal Collective, The Arcade Fire, and so on and so forth. I was given a glimpse of a future of music that could actually give me the chance to say, "wow, a few quality records will be released when I'm in my mid 20's!" However, I wasn't prepared for this year, when I've heard some of the best stuff I've been treated to in ages. So, I figured I'd use my blog for exactly what a blog is for, and share some of my favorites with you guys. If I haven't already burned these records out on you, check them out when you get the chance!

Bright Eyes - "I'm Wide Awake, It's Morning"
The Decemberists - "Picaresque"
The Hold Steady - "Separation Sunday"
Art Brut - "Bang, Bang, Rock and Roll"
Sufjan Stevens - "Illinoise"
Serena Maneesh - "S/T"
Animal Collective - "Feels"

Side note: Yes, I know that I've included links to the reviews from the dreaded Pitchfork Media website. What can I say, they're the only people reviewing this stuff. If someone else would like to do it I'd be happy to visit them instead.

I had a pretty good entry to post here.

I worked on it all morning, thought it was ready, and hit "Publish Post."

This stupid program didn't publish it.

I'll put something up later, right now I'm angry.

George Bush does not care about Galveston!

You may have heard recent weather developments suggesting that Karl Rove's storm machine is back in action today. We here at Blogjammin' have uncovered a secret government plan to destroy the great city of Galveston, Texas, arguably the only city in Texas worth saving. We must stop this man before he strikes again, stop him at all costs!

This fiendish plot was put into action once before. In the year 1900 the President McKinley Storm-O-Matic was tested on the tiny island community of Galveston and the results were more staggering than ever imagined.

The McKinley Machine served as a blueprint for the modern day Rove device.

Why is it, you ask, that the government is so determined to destroy Galveston? Well, it's simple really, tourism dollars! Located 50 miles south of Houston, Galveston regularly saps tourism dollars away from the home of the Astrodome. This has become a major thorn in the side of the powerful oil magnates that hold an iron grip on the economy of South Texas.

With thousands of "beautiful people" flocking to Galveston every year to soak up the sunshine and local color, Houston is left to deal with "hundreds of ugly, ugly people... you should see the beaches, it's awful (says an unidentified source in City Hall)."

Is there any way to save Galveston? The answer is a definite YES! The government actually has a secret weapon in storage developed exclusively for the purpose of saving the tiny island community in the event that a strong hurricane may arrive while various Houston dignitaries are on vacation... that weapon is known as Weapon G.

We were able to obtain a pair of photos of Weapon G. in it's holding pen in Southern California.


As you can see, this super soldier stands ready, arms crossed, face in a constant grimace. So why is it, with a storm speeding into Galveston as we speak, is Weapon G. still in custody? Is it possible that the same government that found itself so eager to drop the bomb on Hiroshima and Nagasaki will not use a similar super weapon for the purpose of saving lives?

I ask you all to call your Senators and Congressmen and demand the use of Weapon G! Let them know that we know that it's out there and we will not sit idly by and allow another U.S. City to fall prey to storm damage! Demand the immediate dismantling of Rove's Storm Machine and release of Weapon G TODAY!

FREE WEAPON G!

YARRRRR!

Avast ye, mateys! Today is International Talk Like A Pirate Day! I expect nothing but Buccaneers and whatever it is that you call Female Buccaneers out there in cyberspace! Some of you may be inclined to believe that I'm making this up, to those of you I order ye to walk the plank!

We take this day to celebrate some famous pirates that have brought so much meaning to our lives. Pirates that not only improve the quality of life in America, but operate in a worldwide pirate campaign to bring peace and harmony to the world. Screw the U.N. Delegation, if you want to unite the world, simply bring in the pirates!

See, everyone's getting in on the fun!

So join me, brothers and sisters, mateys and matettes! Let us set sail on a ship known as brotherhood and rid the world of evil, for that's the code of the sea!

ARRRRRRRRRR

The President Needs to go Potty

While addressing the United Nations yesterday (see Brinton's Blog for more info on all of that), President George W. Bush was photographed passing a note to Secretary of State Condeleeza Rice.

If you're having trouble making that out, it says, "I think I MAY NEED A BATHROOM break? Is this possible"

Immediately after passing the note, Prinicipal Annan asked the President to come to the front of the class and read the note out loud to everyone. He was then required to stay after the meeting and write "I will not pass notes at the UN General Assembly" 100 times on the chalkboard.

I think what I find most disturbing about the note as a whole is the bizarre use of capitalization and punctuation. I think I may need a bathroom break is clearly a statement, so why the question mark? Is this possible is clearly a question, where's the question mark?

Furthermore, I must ask, does the President of the United States need to ask the Secretary of State for permission to go to the bathroom? After five years on the job as President, shouldn't George know whether or not it's an acceptable moment to use the restroom? And really, folks, with all of the "Bill Clinton is whipped" comments that constantly fly around Republican circles, I don't ever recall Bubba asking Madeline Albright if he could have a potty break.

On closer inspection, yet another note was caught on camera from Bush to Dr. Rice. It's really pretty amazing stuff!

Who knew!? Apparently George has come down with a mean case of Jungle Fever... and who can blame him?

OKTOBERFEST!!

Saturday, October 1st, Vickie's house, be there or be square! Vickie is throwing a mega-event in her yard to celebrate Oktoberfest! Now, I'm not sure that anyone is actually confident as to when Oktoberfest actually takes place, so better early than late.

The party will be byob, but isn't any good party byob? And, to add to the excitement, Vickie will be erecting a giant fire to run through, play in, or roast weenies on.


So, come one, come all to Happy Top Road for non-stop excitement. For more information contact Vickie, Rachel, or yours truly (although I've pretty much just given you all of the information that I have).

Well, the Powell County Fair is upon us. There's something magical about this time of year, the leaves begin to turn, football kicks off, and the fair rolls into our town bringing funnel cakes, carnies, and a baby boom of teen pregnancy. It brings out the child in all of us, perhaps mostly because the children we now put on the Bullet or the Round Up are actually riding the same Bullet and/or Round Up that we were on 20 years ago... in fact, maybe you shouldn't put your child on that thing.

Recently, the Powell County Fair has added Papa John's Pizza to the list of healthy, nutritious snacks provided for young and old alike. I guess progress comes whether or not we want it, but what's so wrong with the traditional Lion's Club Fairburger? There was something nice about barking orders at Darryl Abner, Dr. Noss or Pete Thomas... well maybe not so much Pete, being that he actually does that for a living.

Oh well, my point of this post is to announce that I'll be signing off for the weekend a little early this time. One of the other time-honored traditions in Powell County is, of course, Fair Day. The one holiday per year that requires absolutely no decoration, celebration, remembrance, or mandatory backyard barbecues. The one holiday that we all (and by all I mean those employed by the government or school system) get to enjoy while our friends with jobs in other fields slave away. So, being that I punch out at noon, not to return until Monday, my blogging will be a little scarce in the coming days.

Thanks for reading and enjoy the Powell County Fair!!

Minister Farrakhan is back in action!

It should come as no surprise that Minister Farrakhan would manage to find his way into the news in the past few days. But what may actually come as a surprise to many of you is that even hurricane damage is the fault of the white man. Now, I'm pretty white, I meet all of the categories for whiteness. I can't dance, I can't rap, I suck at most sports, and I spend most of my spare time actively oppressing the black man. But, I have to ask, does that really make me guilty of flooding New Orleans?

During a speech in Charlotte, NC Minister Farrakhan shared his thoughts on the flooding of the city saying, "I heard from a very reliable source who saw a 25 foot deep crater under the levee breach. It may have been blown up to destroy the black part of town and keep the white part dry." I'm no Engineer, nor am I an investigative journalist, but it seems like that theory would be fairly easy to prove or disprove. Couldn't one simply go to the rich white neighborhoods in the city, look down, and if you're standing in toxic water then you have your answer.

He's usually such a happy guy.

Granted, it is the unending goal of the white man to crush the black man at any possible opportunity. I, for one, can remember the Whitey Newsletter from last month where we were told about Karl Rove's Hurricane Machine and how we were planning to use it. However, I would assume that like myself most whiteys were surprised to see that the plan was so well executed. I'm not going to say that "The Man" didn't break the levees in an effort to save white neighborhoods, but I can at least say that it wasn't in the original plan. We must just have some really dedicated guys down there in NOLA.

In fact, as I remember the plan we were going to set up the Rove-O-Matic Hurricane Machine 3000 right off the coast, wipe out most of those nasty Democrat Voters in New Orleans (hoping to spare as few of our Red State Brothers in Mississippi as possible) and blame the whole thing on Mother Nature (that'll show the environmentalists). There was nothing in the plan about breaking the levees, that was just quick thinking.

I guess it's time to send Mr. Farrakhan back to the street corner to sell a few more beanpies. And am I the only one that wonders whether or not that bowtie spins 360 degrees when he pushes a button in his pocket? I can promise you that mine would. In fact, I'd like to take this opportunity to announce my candidacy for the Leadership of the Nation of Islam. I'll bring a fresh new face to the organization!

A bowtie in every drawer and a beanpie in every fridge!

THE DAY IS UPON US!!

I know that you've all been eagerly awaiting the information.

You've been whispering in back alleys.

You've been trying to bribe public officials.

You've even tried a Watergate style break-in.

All in vain.

Now the news will be released. Brace yourselves for the celebration. Today marks an important milestone that history has almost forgotten... until now.

Today is the 20th anneversary of the premiere of NBC's "The Golden Girls!"

That's right, 20 years ago today Blanche Deveraux, Rose Nylond, Dorothy Zbornach and Sophia Petrillo made their first appearance as Miami's sassiest seniors.

So go tell it on the mountain! Shout it from the highest point! Celebrate like there's no tomorrow.

For it is truly a Golden Anneversary

Today's must read article is right here, click to read the 25 dumbest things said regarding Hurricane Katrina. I think my personal favorite has to be:

"We finally cleaned up public housing in New Orleans. We couldn't do it, but God did." –Rep. Richard Baker (R-LA) to lobbyists, as quoted in the Wall Street Journal

Also, click here to read one of the most interesting articles I've seen all year. Unfortunately it doesn't contain much news that we didn't already know.

CONGRATULATIONS WENDY!!

Welcome to the world, Reilly Cadence Stewart!

Wendy gave birth to a beautiful baby girl on Friday. I think this is actually the same fetus that destroyed the Gulf Coast! All hail Queen Stewart (don't make her angry).

As Wendy put it, the miracle of childbirth "hurt sooooooooooooooo bad."

Well, at least we don't have herpes.

As Aaron pointed out, the Philly/Atlanta game tonight is a tough call for anyone wanting to toss a few dollars down in a wager. Philadelphia has at least covered the spread in each of the five last meetings between the teams, but some shaky pre-season McNabb may be cause for concern.

At the end of the day, I'd take Philly, especially since the game is almost a pick at this point. As we all know, if McNabb and Owens connect as they have in the past, this will be over before it begins.

I also have an inside tip that Ron Mexico is having a flare up this week... I'm just saying.

Ron Mexico in the locker room

I've copied this article from the New York Daily News.

Yes, I'm aware that the Daily News is not really a newspaper, and I apologize for using it as a point of reference. I shall begin writing, "I will not call the Daily News a paper again" on the blackboard 1000 times... once again, I'm sorry.

Lavish tastes of card-carrying lowlifes

Profiteering ghouls have been using debit cards distributed in the wake of Hurricane Katrina - intended to buy essentials for evacuated families - in luxury-goods stores as far away as Atlanta. "We've seen three of the cards," said a senior employee of the Louis Vuitton store at the Lenox Square Mall in affluent Buckhead, who asked not to be named. "Two I'm certain have purchased; one actually asked if she could use it in the store. This has been since Saturday." The distinctive white cards were distributed by the Red Cross and the Federal Emergency Management Agency and carry a value of up to $2,000. "It doesn't say anything on the card other than alcohol, tobacco and firearms cannot be purchased with it," the store employee told me. "There's nothing legally that prevents us from taking it, unfortunately. Other than morally, it's wrong." The source told me that the two women who had made purchases with the card each bought a signature monogrammed Louis Vuitton handbag in the $800 range. "They didn't look destitute by any stretch. You would never have said, 'They must be one of the evacuees.' … The one that I dealt with yesterday was 20. She'll be 21 next month." The source described the reaction of other store-keepers in the mall - which includes luxury brands Ferragamo, Burberry, Judith Leiber and Neiman Marcus - as "outrage." "It doesn't say anywhere on there, but it would have to be a good amount to be shopping in here," the source said with a dark chuckle.

Adventures in Gambling, Week Two

Week two of College Football has come and gone. Needless to say, there were more than a few upsets over the weekend. Kentucky managed to break their one game losing streak by (barely) defeating a team that the 1994 Powell County Pirates could have manhandled. I think Kevin said it best when he pointed out that, "this game has to really hurt Idaho State's strength of schedule."

Anyway, now onto my wins and losses for week two of the college game and week one of the pro game.

1. (20) Notre Dame V. (3) Michigan
Line: Michigan by 8
Pick: Notre Dame

After spanking Pittsburgh last week it seemed obvious, at least to me, that this game would be far closer than eight points. Notre Dame V. Michigan is one of college football's most storied rivalries, and as we all know, anything can happen in a game like that. Pair that with the soaring Irish enthusiasm and the always-likely-to-implode Wolverines, and you've got a ball game. Having said that, there was no way that I actually expected the Irish to win... just cover.

Final Score: Notre Dame 17 - Michigan 10

2. Tulsa V. (18) Oklahoma
Line: Oklahoma by 31
Pick: Oklahoma

What can I say, I expected the Sooners to come out and mangle Tulsa after being handed a humiliating defeat by TCU last week. Unfortunately, they decided against that. Granted, for me at least, betting on Oklahoma is kind of like telling a girl, "I bet you won't sleep with me," either way I win.

Final Score: Oklahoma 31 - Tulsa 15

3. Cincinnati Bengals V. Cleveland Browns
Line: Cincy by 3 (some say it went off at 4, but the paper said 3)
Pick: Cincinnati

The Bengals are going to be good this year. By good I mean that they'll probably make the playoffs, maybe win one game, maybe not. Of course, for Bengals fans, that's huge! The odds on this particular game were all over the place. At one point, odds makers had the Bengals as a 2.5 point favorite, which is what called my attention to the game in the first place. When it went off at three (or so I thought) I still felt pretty confident. Thanks Bengals, I hope you win every game this season... except for one.

Final Score: Cincy 27 - Cleveland 13

That concludes this week's installment of Adventures in Gambling. Last week left my yearly total at a whopping -2 dollars, but with a couple of wins this week I'm now up to a staggering SIXTEEN BUCKS!! Dinner's on me, folks!

It's coming... only 2 more days!

Yosh is gone 'til November.

He hears you cryin', but girl he can't stay.

I sent a kiss to his mother.

5 days....

While spending a few minutes googling random things this morning, I came across a fairly interesting page (well, to me at least). If anyone's interested these are some old photos of Cabin Creek, WV... home of yours truly. From what I gather most of this stuff was still around when my Mom was young, and obviously it was there when my Grandparents lived there.

Also, if you have some spare time and would like to read up on the mine wars that errupted in that general area, this link offers some quality information (and some pretty neat pictures as well). Pretty neat stuff, if you ask me.

The countdown begins.

6 days until the celebration.

MY 100th POST!!

To celebrate post number 100, I'd like to include a little poetry from a man named Sammy Hagar.

World turns black and white
Visions in an empty room
Your love starts fallin' down
Better change your tune

Standing on broken dreams
never losin' sight - uh! -
Well just spread your wings

And get higher and higher
Straight up we'll climb
Higher and higher
Leave it all behind

'Cause we belong
In a world thatmust be strong
Oh, that's what dreams are made of

Run run run away
Like a train runnin' off the tracks
Like a fool bein' left behind
Fall between the cracks

Standing on broken dreams
Never losin' sight - oh -
Just spread your wings...

And get higher and higher
Straight up we'll climb
Higher and higher
Leave it all behind...

'cause we belong
In a world that must be strong
Oh, that's what dreams are made of
And in the end
On dreams we will depend
'Cause that's what love is made of...

Ahh, Tuesdays... where would we be without them?

Did anyone else catch Daylan on Who Wants to be a Millionaire last night? He didn't win the million, but he did have a few correct answers.

Hot backseat action.

Late night skulking in Trash's yard.

Dash out the door, Jasper's a comin'.

"C'mon Rachel, show 'em, you showed 'em off to the Taco Bell guy!"

All in a Tuesday night.

http://www.onefreeminute.net/

Check this out immediately, it's one of the best things ever.








If you participate, be sure to add a coment to the bottom with the date and time, then we can all listen in!

Surprise, surprise... many of the horror stories from New Orleans were exaggerated, or possibly just outright untrue.

As thousands suffer, some yahoo with a money cannon goes nuts on the beach.

At what point is Curt Schilling just going to sprout wings and fly away? I mean, really, this guy makes Tom Brady look like the Son of Sam.

Alright, round up the usual suspects.

Today I ran into Cousin David at the top of Hall's Lane. He was Frankfort bound, I was en route to the Powell County Courthouse to finish out the work day. Nothing odd, nothing unusual...

He follows me back to the parking lot where we exchange waves, step out of our vehicles and begin to talk. With a smile, David begins to speak. "I didn't know if it was you, I saw that on the back bumper and thought I had the wrong car." Confused by his statement I walked around to the back bumper of my vehicle and what do I find? A sticker that reads, "I AM PROUD BUSH IS OUR PRESIDENT."

Apparently someone "got me" with that one. And, being that I can take a joke, I just laughed and peeled the sticker from the back of my car (it's currently on my desk, waiting to be sent off to the print lab).


Now, just to let you know, I'm creating a list of suspects. I will get to the bottom of this mystery and exact my revenge with the pounds and pounds of leftover Kucinich/Dean/Nader/Chandler material that is tucked into every free corner of my apartment. So, I present to you my list of suspects. I will be happy to receive anonymous tips on the comment section, and if you can prove your innocence I'll be more than happy to remove your name.

Brian "Trash" Frazier: Currently "Trash" resides as public enemy number one. This perfectly fits his M.O. and he's the type to have this type of sticker lying around.

Shane "Puff" Carpenter: Not only a very close second, but quite possibly could be working in conjunction with "Trash" on this project. As time goes on I expect to either get a bust or move him into the top spot.

Teddy Ray Lacy: See the above two, combine the statements, and apply here.

Nathan Johnson: Entirely possible, perhaps still reeling from my threats to cover his bumper with "Got Kucinich?" stickers in the primary.

Nathan Willoughby: Could have been a top three candidate, but I haven't seen him in weeks... maybe that's his game...

Aaron Saylor: Due to his leftist ideas he ranks low on the list, but don't write him off, in fact he may be the most likely name so far.

Any additional information will be appreciated... don't worry, I WILL get to the bottom of this.

Below is an entry on my adventures in sports betting. I try to keep the posts short and at least mildly entertaining. If they become something that you folks just intentionally skip over, let me know. I can start a seperate page (ala Brinton) for that info.

Woo Hoo! Football!

Thanks to the awesome power of the internet you'll be granted the ability to keep track of my sports betting wins/losses. Granted, I don't plan on actually betting much this year, so I'm just going to post the bets that I had planned on making, now that my anonymous bet taker fellow has retired.

All bets will be the minimum 20 dollar bet, unless otherwise noted. There is a 2 dollar "juicing" fee for a loss.

1. NC State v. (8) VA Tech.
Line: Tech by 13
Pick: NC State

Don't get me wrong, VA Tech is going to be the real deal this season. However, it just appeared to me that a young starting QB (Don Mexico) against a tough NC State defense would still provide a win, but not a double-digit win. Besides, haven't we learned not to believe the hype about VA Tech by now? It seems to me that every year someone picks them to really make some noise, often to win the National Title (this year is no different) and we're yet to see one... ok, to be fair the Hokies Women's Table Tennis squad did pull a National Title this year.

Final Score: (8) VA Tech 20 - NC State 16

2. (9) Miami (FL) v. (14) Florida State
Over/Under: 37
Pick: Over

I have to say, Shane warned me about this one. In hindsight you should always listen to Shane when it comes to Miami Football (well, except when he's picking the winner). Inexperience on both sides came shining through, field goals were once again an issue, and yet another over hyped Miami v. FSU game bores the nation to death. I agree with most people that football in general is better when these teams are title contenders, but at a certain point I just get tired of hearing about them. Oh, and in case you didn't already know, I can't stand either of these street gangs masquerading as football teams.

Final Score: (14) FSU 10 - (9) Miami (FL) 7

So, there you have it. Counting the "juice" I'm currently two dollars in the hole. Certainly could have been a worse start to the season, so I'm not complaining.

Two days after 9/11, Jerry Falwell took to the airwaves to proclaim that God had allowed the United States to be attacked because "the pagans and the abortionists and the feminists and the gays and the lesbians" had tried to transform America into a secular society. Just this weekend, wingnuts from the Westboro Baptist Church turned out at the funerals of two fallen soldiers to say that God is punishing the United States in Iraq for its tolerance of homosexuality back home.

So when Hurricane Katrina hit land yesterday, we knew it was only a matter of time before we'd be hearing from the lunatic fringe again. And now, here it is. In an email message we just received, a group calling itself Columbia Christians for Life alerts us to the fact that a satellite image of Hurricane Katrina as it hit the Gulf Coast Monday looks just like a six-week old fetus.

"The image of the hurricane . . . with its eye already ashore at 12:32 p.m. Monday, August 29, looks like a fetus (unborn human baby) facing to the left (west) in the womb, in the early weeks of gestation (approx. 6 weeks)," the email message says. "Even the orange color of the image is reminiscent of a commonly used pro-life picture of early prenatal development."

And in case you're not getting the point, the email message spells it out in black and white: "Louisiana has 10 child-murder-by-abortion centers," the groups says, and "five are in New Orleans."

I'd like a moment of your time to share some information on the nightmare taking place in New Orleans. I was just going to link some articles, but since most of the information came from Salon I'll just copy and paste.

The U.S. Senate approved $10.5 billion in emergency disaster relief for Katrina last night, and the House of Representatives is expected to approve the measure this morning.

Republican National Committee chairman Ken Mehlman has other priorities in mind. In an e-mail he sent yesterday, Mehlman called on the Senate to eliminate the estate tax. And he urged his supporters to call their senators -- "today" -- to demand that they get on board with the plan.

The message arrived in our in box at just about the same time Scott McClellan was pushing away criticism of the president by saying, "This is not the time for politics."

The current plan is for Bush to visit Mississippi but limit his New Orleans tour to a flyover; the Big Easy isn't safe for the president, physically or politically. Although there are some signs this morning that conditions may finally be improving in parts of New Orleans, much of the city remains in dire straits, and the rage over the government's response is growing. New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin said yesterday that state and federal officials need to stop having "goddamn press conferences" and get relief efforts moving. "We have an incredible crisis here and [the president's] flying over in Air Force One does not do it justice," Nagin said in a radio interview last night. "Excuse my French, everybody in America, but I am pissed."

NPR's Robert Siegel seemed equally stunned Thursday when Homeland Security chief Michael Chertoff suggested that the stories reporters were filing on conditions at the convention center amounted to a "rumor" that shouldn't be believed.

Joan Walsh notes in Salon today, CNN's Anderson Cooper laid into Louisiana Sen. Mary Landrieu when she used time on his show to start thanking government officials for their relief efforts. "Senator, I'm sorry," Cooper said. "For the last four days, I have been seeing dead bodies here in the streets of Mississippi, and to listen to politicians thanking each other and complimenting each other -- I have to tell you, there are people here who are very upset and angry, and when they hear politicians thanking one another, it just, you know, it cuts them the wrong way right now, because there was a body on the streets of this town yesterday being eaten by rats because this woman has been laying in the street for 48 hours, and there [are] not enough facilities to get her up. Do you understand that anger?"

Landrieu said that she was angry about the storm but that she wasn't angry at anyone. Cooper didn't let up. "Well, I mean, there are a lot of people here who are kind of ashamed of what is happening in this country right now, what is -- ashamed of what is happening in your state. And that's not to blame the people that are there, it is a terrible situation, but you know, who -- no one seems to be taking responsibility. I know you say there's a time and a place for kind of, you know, looking back, but this seems to be the time and the place. There are people that want answers, and people want someone to stand up and say: We should have done more."

George H.W. Bush, appearing with Bill Clinton on CNN today, said that he thinks that members of his son's administration are "taking all the right steps" on Hurricane Katrina. They'll certainly look good doing it. As conditions continue to deteriorate in New Orleans, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice was spotted today in New York, where she reportedly spent several thousand dollars on new shoes.

The people at the Parents Television Council have been irritating me for quite some time now. In fact, Brent Bozell (head of the PTC) is going up on my ten most wanted list... whenever I actually make one.

These people desperately long to join forces with our old friends at MOVIEGUIDE and start some sort of unholy holy war against indecency. Well guess what, I LIKE INDECENCY! I'm not one bit interested in family values, I don't mind implied penguin mating, and if you take The Shield and Rescue Me off of MY television I'm going to be angry, very angry.

However, it's important to realize that these people are completely out of touch with reality. Just in case you feel that you need proof that they're completely nuts, here's a quote from a recent article on the Comedy Central Roast of Pamela Anderson:

Like the film The Aristocrats, which opened in theaters just a few days before, the Pamela Anderson roast featured a roster of mostly unknown comedians telling the same dirty jokes, each trying to be more shocking and outrageous than the last.

Now, let's check the list here, see who some of these "unknown comedians" in The Aristocrats might be:

Jason Alexander
Hank Azaria
Lewis Black
Drew Carey
George Carlin
Phyllis Diller
Whoopie Goldberg
Gilbert Gottfried
Eric Idle
Bill Maher
Chris Rock
Don Rickles
The Smothers Brothers
Jon Stewart
Robin Williams
Steven Wright

... who the hell are those guys anyway?

Just when you thought things couldn't really get that much worse.

In the days immediately following the terrorist attacks on the World Trade Center, President George W. Bush arrived on scene to lift the spirits of those stationed at ground zero. With a bullhorn he proclaimed, "I hear you, and the world hears you," as the nation swelled with pride and maybe even shed a tear.


Now, in 2005, a natural disaster has caused even more damage than that of 9/11. It could result in a larger loss of life and a more damaging blow to the American Economy and general way of life.

With thousands of people missing, starving, and begging for medical assistance, one can't help but ask, "where is the president now?"

Could it be that there's something different about these people?